Stranger Danger!

Safety first! In a world full of surprises, we never know what adventures, people, or experiences we will encounter throughout the day. Since I truly believe knowledge is power, I thought I would share with you some of the "Survival Signals" from Gavin de Becker's book, The Gift of Fear.

In his book, de Becker explains that in each of us is the ability to recognize danger, yet it is simply a matter of allowing those signs to shine through. Intuition. The sooner we recognize that it is possible to face danger first hand, the more likely we are to acknowledge it, and thus remove ourselves from the situation. Throughout his book, de Becker states specific examples of crimes and situations, and purposely relates these crimes as women being the victims and men being the attackers. This does not mean that only women are victims or only men are attackers, or that every stranger is a potential assailant, just that we all need to be more aware of our environments and open to our inner bodyguard.

1. No!
Never discount the word "No"! It is a simple, yet powerful word, that often times is ignored for many different reasons. Now, I'm not talking about a child asking to get something from the Ice Cream Man and ignoring Mom's no (because dinner is almost ready), but when a complete stranger for some reason won't listen when you say no. If, for example, a woman is offered assistance placing groceries into her car, and a complete stranger offers her assistance, then is it rude to say "No"? Absolutely not! According to de Becker, women should not be afraid to insult a possibly nice gesture in order to ward-off a potentially hazardous situation. Giving in or negotiating with a stranger opens the door to possibilities or places the stranger in control of the situation. And that is exactly what a potential attacker is looking for, control.

2. Promises, Promises.
Promises from a stranger (or attacker) display their knowledge that you aren't buying what they are saying. For example..."I'll put the groceries down and go. I promise." This suitor understands that they are not trusted, and therefore must make an attempt to calm his potential victim by reassuring that he is trustworthy. "Promises are used to convince us of an intention, but they are not guarantees."

3. "Forced Teaming"
Forced teaming automatically places a potential victim and his attacker into a situation together. It portrays a shared experience when there has been nothing shared. For example, "We've got a hungry animal in there." or "Both of us are going to be late." The reason behind creating bonds with strangers can only be determined by the issuer, however, they should never be looked at lightly.

These are only a few of the "Survival Signals" de Becker uses in order to teach people how to protect themselves. To learn more, I highly recommend reading his book!

Good Luck and Great Health!